Hey, Why Don't We Do That?!

i recieved an email today from a parent. he was (understandably) concerned about his grade, but unlike most parents, there was a very specific reason for panic. they were moving to japan next month. why is this cause for panic? this is what i learned today:

apparently, the japanese high school system is very strict on entrance requirements. you can't just enter a public school, like you do here. (in fact, we are required to take any child of a particular age, regardless of background or legal status.) in japan, you have to take a test that is similar to the SAT or ACT, but that's not all. you also have to successfully complete an interview, present recommendations, and show all grades from previous schools and grades. unlike here, ALL of it counts towards your admission to a decent high school. and you want to make sure you get into a good high school, because going to a low level high school excludes entry into a japanese college or university. what it all boils down to is this: everything you do in school is important and carries a consequence.

wow, what a concept. and while i'm not opposed to public education, it would be nice for students to actually have to work hard to attain goals. (goals that are not hung on arbitrary testing scores that someone who has never been in a classroom has dreamed up.)  they do in my classroom, but not everywhere else, especially in grade and middle schools where students often get passed on even though they really shouldn't be. this way, they would start understanding from elementary school that academic choices affect you.

Please Just Take a Nap!

ok, i'm finally at that point. normally, i don't allow students to sleep in my class, for obvious reasons. i even have a spray bottle used to wake up sleepy kids. (fun for everyone except the victim...) but at this point - a week from final exams - it's more effort than it's worth. the kids that can't be bothered officially gave up a few weeks ago; why bother trying anymore when it's too late to bring up your grade? so they do nothing but disrupt class and command the attention of those around them. lately they've started sleeping while we read Fahrenheit 451, and i've started letting them. i really hate admitting that, but sadly, it's the best solution for all involved. they don't have to find something to entertain themselves since they refuse to do work, the kids around them aren't distracted, and i don't have to deal with the outcome of both. it makes me feel a little ineffective, but you can't force a student to learn, especially in the last weeks of the year. if they set their minds against it, that's it. i can entice most of them, and what i need to remember is that about 85% of them make the effort and enjoy what they're doing. for the other 15%, well, if you can't get away with skipping school, at least catch a nap; that way i can teach the others without you interupting...

Oh, the 5th Period Quotes, They Keep A-Comin'

"there's nothing more fun than a foam finger. seriously, these things are genius!"

"wonder if disney people would have a heart attack if i walked into disney world and started pointing at people. would they freak out and be like, 'no! you're not pointing right!'?"

"ooh! look! i can open the cabinet with the foam finger!"

From 5th...

me: ok, today we'll be reading pages 63 to 39 -

student 1: 39?

me: oops, just kidding. 93. apparently i'm dyslexic today.

student 2: hey, me too!

me: it must be catching.

student 2: ooh, i'll be careful where i sneeze, then.